A WORKING WEEKEND
(OR BLOWING, BEER AND SKITTLES!)

7.45 pm: Players start drifting in to band room – some already looking weary after a long working week, others chatting distractedly about all things non-bandy (at least 80% of the cornet section and 50% of the horns fall in to this latter category – you know who you are!!)

7.50 pm: Tune-up and warm up for most – more chatter time for the usual suspects!

8.00 pm: Melvin White raises the baton for the first session of a working weekend of band training and rehearsal.

10.10 pm: A little over 2 lip-numbing, temple-pounding, exhausting but exhilarating hours later the baton comes down and it’s off to the Bear for a pint and post-rehearsal discussion – WHEN we can get the chatterers to shut up and leave the band hall that is! Consensus is that it was a really good rehearsal and smiles are wide although some are groaning that their smashed lips will not hold out for a whole weekend.

Saturday 18th October

1.30 pm: A slight reprieve from the threatened all-day session as half the band is involved in Hampshire Youth rehearsals either as players or taxi drivers during the morning. Up goes the baton again and a remorseless Melvin coaxes tired lips and lungs into life again for a ripping rehearsal. The White magic works again as everyone sits on the edge of their seats, backs straight, brains in gear [?] – body language alone shows that everyone [even the trombones?] is up for it today. During this first section upper and lower band are split for sectional rehearsal sessions with Jan taking the upper sections and Melvin the lower.

3.00 pm: Tea-break at last! The chatterers go into full swing – do they never run out of things to talk about? Hardly time to gulp the dregs of your cuppa before Whirlwind White is tapping the baton on his stand to re-start. Laudate Dominum, It’s Not Unusual, I Walk With God and Keystone Kops [and others!] all worked and re-worked until Melvin is happy and everyone is exhausted but very satisfied at a day so well spent.

4.30 pm: That’s it for playing today – and it’s home for a break and a shower before the Skittles Night planned for this evening. Come on you chatter-boxes – you have all evening to talk to each other – GO HOME!!!

7.30 pm: The first ball rattles down the alley at the Kings Head – the alley is in the cellar, down some very rickety steps – oh dear, those could cause a few problems as the evening goes on. Especially as the loos are upstairs! It is virtually a 100% turnout of band members and several guests as 43 of us enjoy a great evening of good food and drink, lots of laughter and fun. Melvin and Sue have joined us too – very brave of them.

Our esteemed principal cornet Mrs Boler leads from the front as ever and entertains the troops as her 2 whole glasses of wine kick in, the internal volume control skips to loud, and the giggle muscle works overtime. Newly-wedded Band Chairman Adam is impeded by her wandering hands as he tries to bowl, resulting in a call of “Ok Jan, you and me, outside now!” from bride Katie, who resorts to some reciprocal fondling of Mr Boler in revenge for the assault on her husband! You couldn’t write this stuff in a soap-opera it’s so hot!! Pausing only for a slightly squiffy game of darts on the way out, our intrepid band wends its way home for a night’s rest in preparation for the final onslaught tomorrow.

Sunday 19th October

11.30 am: Everyone is here - even Mrs B. looks okay! (But will it last???) The Trombones split off for a short spell to work on an entertaining Trio with Sue White.

1.00 pm: Lunch break – and in the nick of time for a few people by the looks of it. Coffee and paracetamol anyone? Another good morning’s work completed in spite – or perhaps because – of last night’s lubrication and merriment!

2.00pm: Open Rehearsal time and we are joined by a dozen or so interested guests who watch Melvin putting us through our final paces before a tea and home-made cakes break. Its good to see old friends from other bands who have dropped in to listen.  A short concert performance of the pieces we have worked-up over the weekend is greeted enthusiastically by the audience. Pete Gosney our Bb Tuba player brought along an interesting arrangement of ‘Bare Necessities’ which he performed stunningly on a vintage Helicon, an earlier form of Sousaphone. (Finishing with Laudate Dominum after a three-day blow? You have to be kidding Melvin!)

4.30 pm: An exhausted but very happy and satisfied band says thankyou and goodbye to Melvin who has managed to work his magic again and push MSB forwards at least one huge musical step over the weekend. Now if we could just get those chatterers to shut up and clear the hall we could all go home…………………….